MOB BOSS - Tara Gray

There are some people who know you from the version of yourself everyone sees today. And then there are the people who knew you before any of it.

Tara Gray is one of those people for me. We have known each other since we were little girls growing up in Connecticut. So when Tara joined me on the BLK GRL MOB POD, this wasn't simply an interview with another entrepreneur. It was two women with decades of history sitting down to talk about where life has taken us—and what we've learned along the way.

And Tara's journey has definitely taken some turns.

A Career Doesn't Have to Be a Straight Line

Tara's professional path has included communications and basketball at NYU, Howard University, law school, corporate America, recruiting, consulting, career coaching and entrepreneurship. Looking at that list, it would be easy to see a series of completely different careers.

Tara sees something else: a journey.

Each experience taught her something. Each transition moved her closer to understanding what she wanted—and what she didn't.

But Tara also made an important point about making a major change in your life or career. Before the new opportunity, the coach or the strategy can do much for you, something has to happen internally.

“To make that jump, you have to be internally ready first.”

That part will preach.

Because sometimes we spend so much time looking for the next opportunity that we don't ask whether we're actually ready to become the woman who will take it.

Being Unapologetic About Who You Are

Our conversation also turned to identity—particularly what it means to navigate professional and entrepreneurial spaces as a Black woman.

Tara isn't interested in shrinking herself to make other people comfortable.

“I'm unapologetically Black because that's who God made me.”

She doesn't believe she needs to apologize for who she is before she enters a room, while she's in it or after she leaves. There is freedom in getting to that place.

Not because every room will understand you. Not because everyone will approve. But because you've stopped requiring their approval to understand yourself.

What If It Doesn't Have to Be Either/Or?

Then we got to the part of our conversation that really stayed with me.

Money. Legacy. Enjoying the life you're working so hard to build.

And the pressure women often feel to choose between them.

Tara put it simply:

“I want to live an AND/BOTH life.”

She wants to go to Morocco and have the land.

She wants the vacation and the investment account.

She doesn't want to choose.

And THAT is bigger than money.

How many times have women been presented with an either/or life?

• Career or family.

• Success or peace.

• Enjoy your money or be financially responsible.

• Build the business or keep the security.

• Live now or prepare for later.

Maybe the goal isn't choosing the “right” side.

Maybe the goal is intentionally building a life big enough to hold both.

Building for Today AND Tomorrow

That doesn't mean ignoring reality. An AND/BOTH life still requires planning, discipline and preparation. But building wealth and legacy shouldn't mean postponing your entire life until some magical future date when you've finally earned permission to enjoy it.

Tara's philosophy makes room for both.

Enjoy what you're building. And build something that lasts.

That idea showed up throughout our conversation—from career decisions to entrepreneurship to the way we think about money and what we're leaving behind.

The point isn't simply to accumulate more.

It's to create more choice.

What Makes a MOB Boss?

Toward the end of our conversation, I asked Tara the question I ask every guest:

What does being a MOB Boss mean to you?

For Tara, being a boss means having control over your own direction. But the MOB part matters just as much. It's about surrounding yourself with other people who are moving forward too—people who can support, encourage and challenge one another without requiring anyone to become a doormat in the process.

And THAT is the part I love. Because independence doesn't have to mean isolation.

You can control the direction of your own life and have women beside you as you build it.

Look at that.

AND/BOTH.

Maybe Tara has been telling us the theme of this entire conversation all along.

Tara Gray is this week's featured MOB Boss on the BLK GRL MOB POD. Listen to our full conversation to hear more about career pivots, entrepreneurship, money, identity, legacy—and building an AND/BOTH life.